Fostering my growing depression

How ironic that I make a mobile post on depression as a lay in my hammock on a hoiday weekend.

Anyway as anyone who's battled depression will know it doesn't really go away when times are perticularly good. The inner battle with ones self rages on about every detail big and small. And on this wonderfully blue sky day I lay here lamenting many of the things I've said and done over the last month or so. I saw all this coming and did nothing. It takes a lot to get help with these things. Starting at least six months ago I new my self worth was going down the shiter. I also noticed that most of my interests were no longer interesting. And my taste in music had shifted, normally I'm pretty open to most types now it's a little hard to find something I want to hear even in my own collection. I generally like a lot of the talk radio on NPR but I'm getting more and more finnicky about the topics there as well. Then there is my growing irritability, oh boy! This is a heavy hitter for the folks closest to me and is really their first indication
that something is wrong with me. The smallest thing can set me off. While I don't take it out on anyone my over reaction is embarassing to say the least and in the subject of much further self depravation later on. So ya I guess you could say I take it out mostly on myself in the form of being mad at myself. Feels as if I am saying all the wrong things out loud an can't seem to bring myself to say the things that I need to say at the right time.

Blog from email

Ya! I think I have several ways to make this work now.

Sent from my iPhone

Just trying this out I suppose email to blog is the better way to go.